When there are risks everywhere, do you stay or do you go?

In this age of COVID19, there’s only one thing that’s certain — uncertainty.

As the coronavirus pandemic rages on, it can be tough to know when this will subside, when officials can get it under control and when life goes back to “normal” as possible.

So much is still unknown about COVID19.

How do you combat something that doesn’t discriminate and spreads like wildfire?

Finding Home

I’ve been a New York resident since 2010.

But home for me is Southern California.

I was born and raised there and it is where my immediate family established their roots and lives in America.

With the devastating impact of COVID19, a decision was also fast approaching: When there are risks everywhere, do you stay or do you go?

Living in a city that has become the epicenter of the COVID19 cases in the United States, it was increasingly becoming riskier as the days pass by.

It soon became clear what the two paths were ahead:

1. Stay in New York: I have been working remotely for the last week and a half and I’ve been only venturing out of the apartment to get the essentials like food. Each time I left the apartment, I limited my time and distance to anyone I encountered. I made sure I was always washing my hands and sanitizing all surfaces with disinfecting wipes. Given that my family in Southern California is in the most vulnerable groups (senior citizens with compromised immune systems along with other health problems), I figured that by staying in New York, I would minimize any potential risks to my family if I were to return home. While I have not felt any symptoms associated with COVID19, there’s still a possibility that I may have it and can unknowingly pass it on to them by being asymptomatic.

Risks in staying in New York: New York City is one of the most densely populated cities in America. The number of cases of COVID19 has accelerated in NYC at a pace that has officials scrambling to prepare for the surge of patients that will flood the system by setting up hospitals at places like the Javits Convention Center. But the odds are against you in a situation like this. If I were to get sick, I’d enter this overwhelmed system and not to mention have no family near me if things took a dire turn. While adequate medical resources is an issue everywhere, it’s even more strained in a place that is fighting to keep up with all the cases being discovered each day.

2. Leave New York: With each passing day, the situation becomes direr in New York City. The longer I stay in the city, the more chances I can contract the virus, even if I take all the recommended precautions. With my immediate family back in Southern California, especially in a situation like this, I’d much rather be near my family and support them rather than worry from afar. Plus since everyone is working remotely, there wasn’t a real pressing need to stay in the city.

Risks in leaving New York: Every time you step outside your apartment, you take a risk. Imagine if you were traveling. You would encounter so many surfaces that might have been exposed to someone with COVID19. Travel increases the risks of contracting the virus and spreading it. And once leaving New York, just like everything else, it’s unclear when I would be able to safely return.

Making the Call

There are risks on either path — whether you stay or you go.

For me, it was clear what the throughline was in both paths — be with and protect the family.

To stay, would mean I would minimizing risk to the family by any potential exposure by staying away.

To leave, would mean I would be close to family and be able to help with any essential needs and take the necessary precautions such as self-quarantining when I arrive.

Ultimately after talking things through with my family and a trusted friend who is a doctor on the frontlines, I decided to take the risk of traveling back to California and riding this out close to family.

The Journey Home

The ride to JFK felt like part of a post apoplectic film. Few cars and few people were out on the streets of the Big Apple.

It was even more scarce at the airport itself.

On the plane, there were a handful of people on a flight that would normally be full.

The situation was the same when I landed at LAX.

I’m now self-quarantining away from my family’s home for at least the next 14 days.

If you are in a similar situation, wondering whether to stay or go, in these unprecedented times, there are many things to consider.

One thing I know for sure is to trust that whatever choice you make, it will be one not made lightly and it was the right one for you.